We Are Now Pronounced.. Mr. & Mr.!

On May 23, 2015 I officially married the love of my life and best friend of 11 years.

Our final morning coffee before the wedding festivities began
Our final morning coffee before the wedding festivities began

We chose to have a very small ceremony that we hosted in our home.  We made this decison, as our intention was to expedite our marriage to better support our adoption process. Even though we were having a small living room wedding, I wanted to make sure that it felt special and looked like a wedding.

Things came together nicely and our day couldn’t have been more special for us.

Our living room
Our living room

In the end, I think a small ceremony was the way to go. It allowed us to focus on the true intent behind our marriage and not get caught up in the need to put on a ceremony for everyone else, or keep up with all the lavish weddings.  It was perfect!

May in Winnipeg can be often unpredictable, and we were very fortunate to have nothing but sunshine and warmth our entire day.  Thank goodness, because our photos were scheduled to be outside.  We chose to have photos in the morning to beat the heat and use the morning light. IMG_8960_LR_edited-1The pictures turned out beautifully thanks to Patricia Lynne Photography. I really think she captured us and the love and joy we felt that day.

Following our ceremony, everyone in attendance were picked up and taken to a local restaurant where we had a private room.  This continued the intimacy of the day and capped off what has to be the most important day of my life so far.

Now that we are back to reality, I have been busy getting together all of the name change information.  I have decided to take R’s last name, except for professional reasons where I’ll be continuing to use my previous last name.  We made this decision so that when we have our child, they will have the same last name as both of their parents.  It will make things easier. Especially for travel!

Name changing itself, however, is not an easy task!  I have had to spend a lot of time explaining there is not a “wife” or “bride”.   Once I get through bringing the people into the current decade, everything else is simply administrative.

Next up.. we have our next step in the adoption process tomorrow, which is our two-day parenting education session.  This is a legal requirement when adopting in Manitoba.  I’m excited to take another step in our journey.  2015 has brought us an engagement, a wedding, starting the adoption process.. and eventually a baby.  We couldn’t be happier.

One thing I know for sure.. “He Loves Me” and I love him.IMG_8886_LR_edited-1

You Want Thingamabobs? I’ve Got Twenty!

We are in the midst of writing our Dear Birth Mom letter, sorting through photos and all of the other things you do to create the “right package”.  While doing so, I have come to realize that this letter.. this package.. these photos are going to be the most important part of this process.  It is the piece that tells the birth mothers that we are the parents they are looking for.

I’ve been drafting outlines for the information to include in our letter.  The most difficult task  has been determining “what is important?”. We have heard of parents being picked because they had a dog.. I’ve got 4 (but do we include that or do we sound like animal hoarders).

Ariel- Disney's The Little Mermaid
Ariel- Disney’s The Little Mermaid

Do we communicate that I know every word to nearly every Disney song?   Can recite The Sound of Music from beginning to end?  Or how about that I successfully completed the babysitting course at the age of 12 1/2 and had a lucrative career as a babysitter through my teens? That shows I’m responsible right, and that I know what I’m doing? 🙂

Knowing that you are developing a letter that can change your life forever, and result in the family you have always wanted… is daunting to say the least!

My Mary Poppins Moment
My Mary Poppins Moment

My approach is going to be to just be us.  Communicate that our house is full of laughter and love every day.  We will support our child to make sound decisions, and turn missteps into learning opportunities. Encourage exploration, to be bold and for our child to know each and every day that they are special and loved more than anything.

The positive thing about the letter, is that it causes you to evaluate yourself.  It encourages you to reflect on what is important for a child, and think about your experiences as a kid.  But most importantly it makes you excited to become a parent! I can’t wait to be part of the parent club and in the wise words of Ariel…

“When’s it my turn?
Wouldn’t I love, love to explore that shore up above?…
Wish I could be
Part of that world”